Injured Reserve-Gate Doesn't Quite Have the Same Ring

Former Patriots great Ross Tucker knows for a fact that Patriots players on IR practiced with the team!!

Here are the advantages of doing this:
1. The player develops his skills over the course of the year
2. The player stays involved with the team, building camaraderie and knowledge of the system
3. By giving the player on IR more practice reps, you can give veterans more rest.

Cheating? sure, I guess. Does it affect any games at all? No. Occasionally, Holy Roman Emperor Belichick will give kudos to a practice squad member that helped prepare them that week by imitating the opposing QB. But that's about as big of a deal as it gets.

At this point, people are just looking for anything else they can throw against the wall and stick.

Here is a comment from the reader comments that I loved from the Philadelphia Eagle's Editorial (someone named Brian) about how Senator Arlen Specter should be concentrating on other matters:

"Dear Senator,

I coach youth soccer and we have certain rules that are in place so that all the kids play the same amount of time. Last week we played a team that sat one of their less talented players for 2 quarters, clearly breaking the rules. We lost the game Senator! Their coach clearly cheated! well my goalie didn't show up and we let in 4 easy goals, but that's not the point. They clearly cheated and I am asking that you and the other Senator's investigate them. The opposing coach being influenced by Bill Belichick and company is running rampant and needs to be stopped! I feel that now is a good time to conduct the investiagation as gas prices are back down to 2 dollars a gallon, the economy is on the rise, and no one is dying in Iraq any more.

Thanks Senator

Credibility - Of Which We Have None

There is a point in every stretched-thin news story where the media at-large decides on what the absolute correct opinion is, and that any dissenting opinions have no merit or credibility.

Imagine a group of overweight, middle-aged reporters standing at the edge of the pool afraid that the water is too cold. Finally one reporter decides to throw caution to the wind, close his eyes, and jump in. Well, that guy did it, so it must be okay. So they all jump in the pool, whining like little girls, until they get used to the cold water. Then another reporter comes by dips a foot in, says it's too cold, and the rest of the reporters, start to taunt him for thinking the water is too cold and that he should just jump in already. The lone reporter now has to decide whether to take the taunting and believe his own foot, or jump in because these now-purple-skinned, shivering, fat guys are stuttering through clenched teeth that its warm.

Because this analogy involves a reporter, he of course jumps in, then makes vague indications to support that the water is warm, but it is also very cold. Three months from now when he is confronted about it, he will say that he always advocated that it was warm from the start.

Previous news-related examples include:

1. Post-9/11, if you disagreed with anything the government did, you were un-American.
2. If you believe that Barry Bonds should be in the Hall of Fame, you are blind and have no credibility.
3. If prior to 2001, you didn't think Derek Jeter was the best shortstop ever, you had no credibility.
4. If you think that a very large part of the reason Joe Torre and Phil Jackson have been so successful is because they went where the talent was, you were blind and also had no credibility.
5. If you thought Brett Favre wasn't the greatest warrior the world has ever seen, and that you not-so-secretly have a man-crush on him, you have no credibility.
6. If you listened to the entire speech that Reverend Wright gave instead of the 30 second soundbite, and then dared to utter the word "context" you are not only un-american, you are also a traitor with no credibility, and possibly an illegal alien.

There are tons of examples. The new and most obvious is this:

You have no credibility on SpyGate if:

1. You are a Patriots fan and don't think Belichick should be banned for life
2. You don't think asterisks should be stitched on to the Patriots' uniform
3. You believe that Belichick did not in fact rewind the tape at half time, analyze it, plan for it, then put it into the game in the 3rd quarter.
4. You believe that scouts, coaches, and the random "who are they" people that sit in the booth write down signals and use them if they don't have Flying Elvis on their sleeve.
5. You believe Jimmy Johnson, Phil Simms, and the number of other coaches and former players that said they knew the opponents signals.
6. You don't believe everything Matt Walsh said, but do think he's lying about a walk-through tape.

Since this is the Evil Patriots Blog and we are here to celebrate the glory and the evil genius that might have contributed .05% (I upped it from my original estimate of .00004%) to that success, then my credibility never got established in the first place.

Of course I'm perfectly fine with that. The fact that I do believe he cheated, that he was disingenuous during his CBS interview in having us believe he didn't know it was wrong, is beside the point. I don't care. I love his arrogance. More so, I love the purple vein that pops out of every media member's neck when they hear it. He was already hated before the start of last season. He was already the anti-Christ to Tony Dungy's Ned Flanders. This just cemented it as a fantastic story of good vs evil, where "good" is self-righteous and boring, and evil is centered and more reflective of our desire to see the guy in the white hat lose in the end.

It's why we root harder for Michael Corleone than Fredo, or Hannibal Lecter more than the insufferable Clarise Starling.

Evil will always triumph because good is dumb. It's why we can root for evil but not for serial killers and terrorists. Because serial killers and terrorists believe they are the good guys. Just like class-act Marvin Harrison who apparently got a get-out-of-media-scrutiny-free card with his last contract.

So to sum up, the reason why this blog might have even a small amount of credibility is that we celebrate what we know is evil, rather than seek to refute it.

"A little evil is often necessary for obtaining a great good."
-Voltaire

SpyGate has led to microphones being put into the helmet of an offensive player as it already is on defense. So thank you Bill Belichick for striving to create an equitable and fair playing condition in football. You are the bright light that shines upon those with sensitive eyes.

SpyGate 2 - The Search For a Story

"The Constitution gave us not only the right but the duty to create our own rules, including the rules concerning our ethics. They are enforced internally by the Senate itself."
- -Senator Arlen Specter speaking to his 2006 "nay" vote for creating a Senate Office of Public Integrity...because the Senate is great at policing itself

"What is necessary is an objective investigation," Specter said at a news conference in the Capitol. "And this one has not been objective."
-Senator Arlen Specter today regarding SpyGate

0
-Number of times in his long illustrious career that Senator Arlen Specter has called for a Senate investigation on ethics.

"The tension between Senator Specter and me was measurable. The process seemed to break down completely. Senator Specter would repeat the same questions until he got the answer he wanted.... To the press and spectators, we must have sounded silly and ill tempered. More than one sigh erupted from the seats behind me as Specter returned to the questioning and I once more gave my explanation. Clearly, neither of us would budge from our position.

Something in the back of my head said, 'Just say what he wants you say and get on with it.' But I was much too stubborn to do that. And the more he pursued it, the more inclined I was to resist. Digging in was, perhaps, for me one way of hanging on to some amount of my dignity. By now I knew that his questions were both insincere and ill informed. Though I tried to answer him, I was equally determined that the senator not put words in my mouth."

-from Anita Hill's book Speaking Truth to Power about her experience during the nomination proceedings for Clarence Thomas

Now, for the record, I like Arlen Specter's voting record overall. He was voted one of America's 10 Best Senators in Time Magazine after all. He's a moderate Republican who Republicans hate and Democrats don't trust. That's someone your average person who hates Hannity AND Colmes can relate to.

But it's pretty obvious from his press conference today and knowing what we know about him, that he's the kind of person who wades through the facts to get to the vague allegations of a very obviously revenge-driven former employee, to support his own conclusions. Why are the words of Matt Walsh gospel? Is it because he acknowledged that he didn't have a walk-through tape so he must be on the level?

Now Senator Specter wants an independent investigation. This is from a man who was a key member of the Warren Commission that investigated the death of JFK. So he knows all about hastily thrown together investigations that don't involve interviewing key witnesses so that preconceived theories can be put forth as fact that no one will ever question in the future.

I say bring on the independent investigation. Since this is the Evil Patriots Blog and I figure that everyone I hate would be a member of this investigative team with absolutely no axes to grind, here is my list of candidates for the investigation. I encourage you to submit your own as well if I've missed any good choices:

SpyGate Commission:

Co-Chair: Arlen "Eagles were not tired, they were victims" Specter
Co-Chair: Indianapolis Colts coach Tony Dungy (to provide moral integrity)

Members:
1. Conduct a random lottery of every senator that receives campaign contributions from Comcast (such as Arlen Specter) so that the investigation can somehow mandate that all citizens be allowed to have the NFL Network.

2. Former NFL players that never cheated, punched or kicked their opponents, or tried to manipulate the referees such as Chris Carter and Mark Schlereth to represent the outraged former players that are still appalled by this.

3. Gregg Easterbrook to represent NASA.

4. Hillary Clinton, she'll have free time soon and will need to find someone to take out her anger on.

5. Nancy Grace. I hate that self-righteous biatch.

6. SI's Peter King. Because with all the investigating someone needs to bring coffee. And that will provide a good solid page of travel notes for his MMQB.

7. John Tomase, Boston Herald. When you run out of ideas and need something to reinvigorate a dead story, he's your man.

8. Julie Mangini. what? It's not Eric, it's his wife. There's no conflict at all.

9. Celtics coach Doc Rivers. Strategist.

10. The whole crew at ESPN:360 who's melodramatic recreation of team meetings where they look WAY too interested in what non-story their colleague is discussing with such fervor, should really come in handy here.

By the way, oil reached a new record today, two massive natural disasters happened in the past week, foreclosures continue to climb (nothing in the mail today!), Iran will be able to actually put up rather than shut up soon, Vladimir Putin is Dictator For Life, Darfur - it's not just for celebrities any more, 800 illegal immigrants just crossed our border while I thought about what to say about Darfur, baby boomers are about to realize healthcare doesn't care at all, I am never ever going to see a social security benefit in my lifetime.

But who cares? Congress will be commiting your tax payer dollars to an independent investigation of just how extensively a coach of a game of football taped the signals of other coaches that knew it was happening and didn't care.

Good times.

And We're Back!

Hello everyone, sorry it's been so long since I've posted on here (despite promising many more posts than the two I've submitted since the depressingly awful superbowl). Quick side note, every time I see the Celtics play on the road in the post season, it reminds me of the Superbowl. It's just mind-numbingly ridiculous that teams that can be that good at home could suddenly look so bad on the road. The Patriots weren't terrible on the road obviously, just really bad at the worst possible time.

Now that SpyGate D-Day is upon us, I thought it a good time to get back on the horse and chime in with some overdo comments (if I got paid for this I think I could start relating to why the SportsGuy seems to go weeks without submitting more than a podcast).

1. SpyGate - I actually feel let down. I didn't want to hear about a Rams walkthrough tape, but I did want to hear about the Steelers in the AFC Championship, because I hate the Steelers so much. I get the feeling there was a little more than what they were punished for, but not enough that Roger Gooddell couldn't sweep it under the carpet. So that ends that. Now what's next for Spygate?
• Meet your new most-hated man in Boston: John Tomase of the Boston Herald. John Tomase, the guy that looks like his sources all came from the World of Warcraft, was the writer who "broke" the story the #@$! day before the Superbowl about the Patriots taping a walkthrough of the Rams with his 1 whole source. I know times have changed a bit, but in my college journalism class, it was grilled into me that I needed three sources for a story, especially one where allegations were involved.
• Dale Arnold HAAAAATTTTTEEEESSSSS John Tomase right now and he's having a very difficult time saying it without actually saying it. And I liked the fact that Michael Holley, a former journalist, now puff piece sports book writer, took the Herald to task for it.
• Right now, it's 2:30pm on Tuesday, and Gregg Easterbrook, Bob Kravitz, Mike Fish, and so many others are getting ready to write their "They still cheated and should be stoned to death like the blasphemous sons of whores that they are" columns. Their saving grace is that Senator Arlen Specter just spit up his Tapioca pudding when he heard Roger Gooddell say that nothing new was learned about taping signals and will surely come out to denounce the Patriots tomorrow. He will subsequently work day and night to get a bill ratified that will officially recognize the Philadelphia Eagles as Superbowl Champions.
• 2:35 PM, still no story of any kind about the SpyGate press conference on the Boston Herald website. But of course it couldn't bump more important stories off the front page like this gem: "Vatican: It's OK to Believe in Aliens" (I'm not even making that up). According to the new anti-Herald Dale Arnold, they didn't even send someone to New York for the press conference. Wonder why?
  

2. NFL Draft - Is there anything more over hyped than the NFL draft? I did watch the first round (though to be honest I flipped over and watched Glory...one of those movies that when you click by it, you're obligated to watch...kind of like Schindler's List and Roadhouse). I'm pretty happy the first round times were cut to speed it up. It was almost worth watching 5 people on the ESPN set talk nonsense about players they are currently mis-reading. I think Mel Kiper is the sports equivalent of a New England meteorologist. He's wrong constantly, but occasionally even the weather guy will call for a sunny day that is.

3. I thought the Patriots did well in the draft for what that's worth. I had been holding out hope that Chris Long would somehow fall to the Chiefs at #5 and the Patriots would deal for him, which is apparently what they were hoping as well. But Mayo was a good pick. The downside is that I can't watch Monday Night Countdown any more after games where May has a sack or interception because I really don't think I'm up for the next 10 years worth of Chris Berman "Hold the Mayo" jokes. And I felt really good every time they showed the top 10 pick board with the teams' respective 2007 records. That was just gravy.

4. A nice surprising and refreshing change of pace was this week's NFL power rankings (coincidence that Sportsline, ESPN, and SI.com all came out with them this week?). Instead of the "well the SB champs are #1 until someone knocks them off" nonsense, everyone put the Giants around #5. Well done. The Evil Patriots are #1, ensuring the hatred of every non-Patriots fan will continue to boil right through opening weekend (no national Patriots game? They have a 16 game winning streak on the line, were AFC Champs, and not national game. We'll call it even for the Patriots allowing a guy on IR to practice back in 2001, which was a revelation from Matt Walsh today).

5. Does anyone else get the feeling that we're going to remember the 2008 Bruins playoffs more warmly than the 2008 Boston Celtics post season?

6. I love Bill Russell. Let me get that out of the way. BUT...you're as proud of Kevin Garnett as you are of your own children? Does that mean when you take them to games, that at the end of the third quarter they stand up and tell you they're leaving? And what does that mean that you'll share one of your championships with him? Will he get a ring from you? Does Paul Pierce now start feeding Tommy Heinsohn a bottle of Jack before each game (to go with the one he finishes before half time) so that maybe he'll get the same offer? And what if Larry Bird told Ray Allen he was as proud of him as his kids? How would Ray Ray respond to that from the guy who only acknowledged his daughter when he wrote her name on support checks? Yeah...I went there. Love Larry Bird the basketball player and he'll always be my favorite...I probably won't nominate him for father of the year though. Of course he seems to be a notch above Karl Malone (check out ESPN.com's Jemele Hill's column on Karl's relationship with his kids from other mothers...not so heartwarming).

7. One more thing on SpyGate. I guess I should have seen this coming. John Tomase wraps up the most hated man in Boston. But, Black Ops Commander Ernie Adams will be the media punching bag until he agrees to come out from under deep cover to explain his role with the Patriots. He's the one that received the tapes, and it's been speculated for a long time now that he does the dirty work for our evil overlord Bill Belichick.

8. 60% of the 35000+ people who voted on ESPN.com dissaprove of the recent handling of SpyGate by the NFL. If you had the New England States as the only states that would vote for "yes", you would be wrong. Michigan has our back baby!! I guess when your team is the Lions but there is a winning team with a star Michigan quarterback, it's time to hitch a ride on the Evil Patriots bandwagon.

9. Is it blasphemous for me to secretly wish for two straight Red Sox seasons where they finish in last place so that that bandwagon will clear out a little? Possibly my biggest pet peeve of the last 10 years is the whole notion of "Red Sox Nation" which started as a goof fan-based movement because of how many transplants that can't afford to live in this !@#$ state any more show up to away games. When they started selling membership cards for it, I (taking a note from the SportsGuy) "threw up in my mouth". When they held a rigged election for President of Red Sox Nation, no one was surprised that massively over-exposed, shameless self-promoter, Jerry Remy got the gig. Even then I was letting it go. But then Jordan Furniture put out their ridiculously impossible sweepstakes commercial where they have to not only make the world series again this year, but also sweep whoever they play, and used Jerry Remy (as Red Sox Nation president) to call whichever brother that is that didn't know it was time to retire, and beg "on behalf of Red Sox Nation" to extend the sweepstakes another week. Since the first time I hear the term Red Sox Nation (it was 1999, the road trip that ended with Pedro striking out 17 in Yankee Stadium), I have never introduced myself as a member because it's the equivalent of putting a pink hat on my head. But, that commercial was the nail in the coffin for me. I haven't been to a game since 2005 (because the tickets that used to be available now go to the prospective clients of John Hancock Insurance and the friends of Citizens Bank). So I figure that two straight years of last place finishes should clean out all of the people who go to the game so that they can call their friends on the cell phones and wait for the wave to get to their section.

10. Tony Dungy is an ass. We get it. You're a man of high moral character that does everything the "right way" all the time. But even the sanctimonious jackasses of the world start to rub people the wrong way when their self-righteousness becomes elitist judging of others for not striving to be as morally superior as yourself.

Thanks for checking in and I'm promising "for realz" that there the updates will be more frequent and no doubt I'll have plenty more on SpyGate tomorrow when the columnists dismiss today's events to call for the banishment of Belichick from coaching ever again.

Also thanks to all of the readers that emailed me with thoughts, questions, and threats if I didn't post something soon. Your warm wishes and fear-mongering tactics brought me here today.

Thoughts on Free Agency, Spygate, and now Favre

First, let me apologize for not having an update last week. The flu swept through the Evil Patriots Compound and showed no mercy.

Now that we're just about through the first big wave of free agency, it's time to see where the Patriots stand:

Gone:
Asante Samuel - was there ever any question that he was going to be playing for another team in 2008? "I just want a chance to be able to win and get back to the Super Bowl," Samuel said. "That's why I picked the Philadelphia Eagles." I'm looking forward to the first time the Patriots play the Eagles and Tom Brady makes him jump routes all day long. It's a shame they couldn't retain him, but the 6 years $57 million that he got from the Eagles will be better spent elsewhere.
Randall Gay - Gone to the Saints, Gay will no doubt get some time in the first season there, get hurt, then start two more games for the rest of his career. I am not sorry to see him go.

Donte Stallworth - The Browns made a big splash in the last week and got Stallworth, who should be better in Cleveland as the #1 or #2 than he had a chance to be here as the #3. Like Samuel, Stallworth was pretty much a given to be with another team in 2008. The Patriots won't have to do much to replace Stallworth's production, probably by resigning Jabar Gaffney.
Coming & Staying
Randy Moss - I'm a little curious to see if the coaches can spend the offseason to figure out how to get Randy Moss open again. It should be a little alarming that he was largely ineffective (unless you count double-coverage on one guy an advantage for the Patriots). He'll be worth all $27 million over the 3 years though, and I'm sure will help ease the fears of us who are continuing to see a weakened defense get weaker.

Tedy Bruschi - I love Tedy...but if he's out there for more than 15-20 plays per game next season, it means the Patriots defense is in trouble. He's a low risk signing for certain since he always seems to take the modest contract, so in the end it's a good signing for the football smarts, but not a big one.

Kelly Washington - sure..why not.

Lonie Paxton - thank God our long snapping is secure for another year...

Sam "Don't call me Clay" Aiken - The former Bills receiver will be a good special teams guy

Overall, it's pretty blah. Of course last year they made the big initial splash with Adalius Thomas, who should be a lot better this year. They haven't signed anyone significant that wasn't on the team last year, but did lose Samuel, Stallworth, and Gay. Typically, the Patriots do their best in the 2nd wave of free agency and pick up those utility guys that are dropped from other rosters. By the way, I'm very happy we won't be seeing Zach Thomas here next year. We didn't need a slower Tedy Bruschi. Hopefully they'll get Junior Seau to come back for another year, but who knows with the surfer dude.

As I was typing this, Brett Favre just retired. A moment of silence please...

Favre was undoubtedly one of the most exciting players to watch in the last 10 years and he'll be missed, especially by football bobbleheads over 45. But it's time for the Aaron Rogers era to begin!!! Don't let the fact that the Broncos (Elway) and Dolphins (Marino) failed miserably in finding a replacement that wouldn't crumble under the pressure of being the "successor" get you down.

SpyGate - give Matt Walsh his freakin immunity, get the "evidence" he has and lets get this thing done. If there isn't some kind of story to report on this, every single talk show host wonders the following day what happened to "spygate"? This is beyond ridiculous. No one even seems to care about taping of signals anymore. It's now all about taping the practice before the Superbowl against the Rams. So the guy either has tape or not. Seems pretty simple.

One last thing. Is there any question that Ty Law will be suiting up for the Patriots next season? Of course not.

Reflection Time

First, I apologize for not posting in the days after the Superbowl. It was a weird few days. If I had to compare it to something it would be like the feeling of calmness you have after several bad things happen almost in succession in your life (like you get a letter saying you owe back taxes, then look up to see your significant other complain about the car making bad noises, then hear a crash as you realize your step-son has just destroyed a hutch by assuming his weight could be supported by holding on to the small glass doors that enclose it). When it's one thing at a time you can get upset. But when it's several things almost at once, then you just smile and a wave of eerie calm pours over you as you grab a beer from the fridge and sit down in your most comfortable chair and put it completely out of your mind for 5 minutes.

That's how I felt about the Superbowl. There was so much garbage with spygate, perfection chatter, and hyperbole that all came crashing down when the game was over that all I could do was smile deliriously.

Now that it's been a few days, it's time to "move on" as Belichick said with 2 seconds left on the clock.

In the end, I enjoyed this season immensely. It was a thrilling ride and the climax was a Greek tragedy. But there is a light at the end of that tunnel.

The Patriots were one Asante Samuel interception away from winning the Superbowl. There will be some big changes in the offseason, but there is no reason to assume we won't be seeing the Patriots go deep in the playoffs again next season.

Until then we have the Celtics and Red Sox to cheer on (even if KG and Schilling aren't exactly making us feel warm and fuzzy right now).

I'll be updating the blog as news comes up throughout the offseason, so I hope you'll check back periodically. Evil Patriots was a much more successful blog than I thought possible because of all of you visiting and commenting throughout the season.

I will definitely be posting once per week, so if you enjoyed the blog, I'd encourage you to check back or subscribe to the RSS feed.

Evil Vanquished

If you're too young to know what all the whining was about regarding the 86 Red Sox...well now you know.

Unlike every other game this year where the Patriots were down at some point in the second half, I never felt like they were really going to win this game. For a brief moment when they scored their final touchdown, I felt like things were setting themselves right in the universe and the Patriots would shut down the Giants for the win. Just incredible really.

A few quick hits:

1. The Giants were the best team this post season and got better every single game.
2. Eli was as good as Brady was bad on 3rd down.
3. Goats: Matt Light, Brady, Ellis Hobbs
4. Everything was un-Patriots like - penalties, bad play calling, bend and then break defense in the end, inaccurate throws, you name it.
5. If the Patriots had won, Wes Welker (who tied Deion Branch's SB record with 11 catches) would have been the MVP.
6. Pretty much everyone who is headed to the Pro Bowl next week from the Patriots came up small tonight.
7. It was a great season regardless. If you can avoid media of any kind in the next week, you'll come around to feeling that way too.


Reasons this loss was worse than the 86 Red Sox:

1. Mercury Morris has a platform to gloat on again
2. The entire country will see this as a karma thing.
3. Best Team Ever become cautionary tale.
4. 19-0, 4 in 7 years, best QB in history....all gone.
5. Losing to a New York team
6. Ditka, Easterbrook, Plaschke, Norman Chad, Dr. Z, and many more
7. It's difficult to gloat about an evil team when they get vanquished.


That's it for me tonight. Good season. Spring Training is right around the corner.

Hear Lots of Evil See Lots of Evil

It's the Saturday before the Superbowl. All of the tired story lines are being put to bed and everyone is now exhausted and just ready to get this game going. Ex-players and current players seem to be picking the Giants a lot more than the media members are, which is not surprising because they're awful at analyzing other teams.

But just before the game gets under way, there is a giant wet blanket set to drop on the Patriots' instead of confetti if they win tomorrow. You can be certain that ESPN editors will be setting half its writers on the "winning the Superbowl" plot line, while the other half will be spending even more hours on the new angle of SpyGate that has been opened with the tapioca-eating Senator from Pennsylvania (a member of the Warren Commission who certainly knows about covering things up).

A month from now there will finally be enough pressure on former Patriots' video assistant Matt Walsh (heretofore referred to as Benedict Arnold) to provide whatever evidence he has of taping the Rams' walkthrough in Superbowl XXXVI and whatever else he can talk about.

If taping the Jets in week 1 was the start of a moral outrage and asterisk campaign, how do you think this will end?

The good news? The World Champion Red Sox will be in training camp by the time that happens.

But for now, I'm putting this out of my mind, will certainly ignore Joe Buck's 50 references to it tomorrow, and will enjoy the game. After that, this Evil Patriots Blog will grow more powerful than you can possibly imagine...because it looks like we'll be able to make it relevant during the entire off season.

I was initially disappointed in this whole thing from yesterday...now I'm embracing it and riding the big "eff you" all the way to another Superbowl win.

In an ideal world, NFL Films would capture Tom Brady at the end of the tunnel turning to his teammates and yelling "You tell them I'm coming! And hell's coming with me!" as he runs out leading his team into the lion's den of hatred and vitriol.

So embrace your inner Evil Patriot and root for the dynasty tomorrow to take everyone down with them....

Breakdown and Prediction for Superbowl XLII

Everyone knows that the Patriots are “beatable.” There has existed a “blueprint” for beating them since they played the Colts in Week 9. The Giants have won 10 straight road victories, which, according to some columnists, make them the hottest team in the league. 99% of the columns you’ve seen this week have been on how the Giants can beat the Patriots. So here below are the factors that the Patriots probably have to execute to win the game. Why only probably? Because they prove time and again that they can find new, surprising ways to win and the Giants are playing a road game, which means they can execute the blueprint by playing the most flawless game in the history of the NFL.

1. Mindset: The Patriots are supernaturally focused, unbelievably well prepared, and are obsessively driven on doing their job. The Patriots have been in Superbowl-like pressure games since Week 9 and have a ton of guys that have already been to, and won Superbowls. The Giants have three guys who have been to a Superbowl.

2. Control the Line of Scrimmage. In the regular season match up, the Giants recorded 1 sack while Brady completed 32/42 passes for 356 yards, 2 TD and 0 INT. They did that with the Pats starting right tackle and starting right guard out for that game. They are both back and will be better at handling the outside rushers. Left Tackle Matt Light will be matched up against Osi Umenyiora, which is a match up in favor of the Giants. One thing the Patriots like to do is use Kevin Faulk in the backfield for protection on Brady's weak side, and then roll him out for a short screen pass. This delays Osi, and it opens Faulk up just past the defender. If the Giants don't bring extra defenders from Brady's weak side (left side) you can expect to see a lot of screens to Faulk and Maroney.

3. Moss Factor: Randy Moss has problems getting off the line of scrimmage when he's manhandled, which I’m sure comes as a great shock to you. The Giants beat him up in their match up, as did the Jaguars and Chargers in the playoffs. We've all noticed offensive holding is no longer being called in the NFL, and the same can be said for defensive holding that occurs in the first 5 yards from scrimmage, which is what you have seen in replays on how Moss gets held off his routes. I have no statistical evidence to suggest Moss will come up big here, but it’s his first Superbowl and on the biggest stage, I don’t see him quitting on routes or allow corners to clutch and grab him at the line through the whole game. But if the Giants do contain him that means they rolled safety coverage to him and opened up the game for ultra-speedy Welker (on turf now) underneath, and Stalworth down the sidelines.

4. Environment. The Patriots have not played in weather above 45 degrees since Week 9 at Indy. Many of their road/home games featured high winds, including the regular season finale, and both playoff games in Foxboro. Why is that important? Because you can't air it out 40+ yards when the wind is swirling at the Meadowlands or Gillette Stadium. But in the wind-less, warm confines of the dome in Arizona, Brady will be in the same kind of environment he enjoyed for the first 9 weeks of the season. Remember what happened then? In addition to weather, the crowds at the Superbowl who can afford $1000+ for tickets are notoriously quiet. There will be no noise factor such as the one in the week 17 match up to force Brady to go to a silent count. This opens up the audible and communicating blitz reads clearer.

5. Take Away the Giants’ Strength. If you were to sum up how Belichick game plans for opponents you could just say “he will take away whatever it is that you do best.” How did the Patriots attack the Giants a month ago? They took away the strength of the Giants offense by limiting Brandon Jacobs to 66 yards on 15 attempts. This time Ahmad Bradshaw is back and should help build up those numbers if the Giants choose to go that route. Remember that Eli had the game of his life, passing for 251 yards with 4 TD's and 1 ill-timed interception on 22/32 attempts. Can he duplicate those numbers? Not with a game plan formulated over two weeks to disguise defensive packages and confuse Eli.

6. Red Zone defense. The Patriots are back to playing the kind of defense they did in winning Superbowls in 2001, 2003, and 2004. They "Bend but don't break." This means that offenses will get their yards against them, and if they don't make any stupid mistakes (turnovers, penalties), they'll get in the red zone. But the red zone is where the Patriots have excelled in the last half of the season and in the playoffs. Why? Because you have your very talented and smart, but also old/slow linebackers playing in a smaller field which allows them to cover everyone. The Patriots will be happy to give you the field goal, because they feel they can score touchdowns every time they get in your red zone.

7. Coaching. Check.

8. Intangibles. Brady or Manning down 7, with 2 minutes left in the 4^th quarter with the ball on their own 20. Which QB do you want?

9. Opponent had their game of the year against you and they still lost? Check.

Here is how I see this game playing out:

1^st Quarter: The Patriots and Giants are both limited on offense, but the Patriots will get one TD by the end of the quarter. The Giants will own time of possession by running Jacobs and Bradshaw and mixing in short passes. They will likely get a field goal out of one of their two drives. 7-3 Patriots

2^nd Quarter: The Patriots go to a hurry up offense (this could happen from the start) and score 10 points in this quarter. The Giants also score a touchdown to keep it close at the half. 17-10 Patriots.

3^rd Quarter: The Patriots adjust to the pressure and coverage schemes and strike quick and often. The Giants continue to have success in the running game and short routes, but aren’t getting anything over the top. By the end of the quarter the Giants are down 21 points and will be forced to abandon the run, culminating in an INT at the end of the quarter for Eli. 31-10 Patriots.

4^th Quarter: The Patriots shove Laurence Maroney down their throats, mixing in a couple of deep balls (1 or 2 being successful). Bradshaw takes a quick screen and turns it into a long touchdown run to give them some hope. Then the Patriots give the ball back to Maroney and Faulk, take 8 minutes off the clock and finish it off with a jump ball to Moss in the end zone. Giants don’t get a garbage time touchdown as Junior Seau forces a fumble of Eli and the Patriots recover, run once or twice, then kneel down. As they look up at the scoreboard and see Patriots 38 Giants 17, Belichick turns to Director of Personnel Scott Pioli to start discussing what to do with the #7 overall pick in the draft and who to target in free agency.

MVP: Tom Brady

X-Factor: Donte Stalworth

Enjoy the game. It won’t happen like that at all because no one ever seems to be right in how these things play out. But it should be a fun game. If the Giants pull off the upset, nothing will hurt as much as seeing an orgasmic Mercury Morris rap his way to bashing the Patriots. But if the Patriots win, the nation of Patriots’ haters will turn into those zombies from 28 Weeks Later, foam at the mouth, and rage against the cheating, classless, dirty players from New England. And that would make me happy most of all.

Greatest Ever Discussions

Before I get into the title subject, Mike & Mike are on TV playing up the importance of the fact that the Giants stepped off the plane all wearing black suits. The Patriots upset the Rams in 2001 by choosing to be introduced by a team, but whoah, a whole week before the SuperBowl the Giants are dressing all in the same color (to be accurate a number of them had dark gray on). Game over man, put my money down on the Giants. Fortunately Golic wasn't quite as caught up in it as sports romantic Greeny.

Clark Judge at CBSportsline.com has one of the better "Is Brady the Best QB of All Time?" columns today, because he gets some good varied input from GM's, former players, and old cranky sportswriters, to weigh in with their opinions. I like it because the hyperbole is kept at a minimum, except where Judge adds in his own quips. So it's definitely worth a read, but it keeps reminding me of the hyperbole in the past years regarding the evil disrespectful Tom Brady.

Here is what columnists were saying:

February 2002: "The day of The Catch in January 1982, the day the San Francisco 49ers made it to their first Super Bowl, the day Joe Montana threw to Dwight Clark, Tom Brady was a toddler in the stands. And now, 20 years later, when the New England Patriots win their first Super Bowl, Tom Brady has in effect become the new Joe Montana. He got what he wanted."
Nutshell: Brady reminds people of Montana, because he's cool. He's not a top QB yet though

February 2004: "OK, that's it. I can't take it anymore," writes Rick Morrissey of the Chicago Tribune. "Tom Brady is not John Elway or Joe Montana. He's somewhere in the Phil Simms stratum, a very nice place to be but a place where you have to crane your neck to see the mountaintop. . . ."
Nutshell: Backlash time as people drool over Brady winning his 2nd SB MVP, and start making over-the-top "Brady vs Montana" comparisons. Brady vs Manning now a toss-up with the rings getting Brady an edge for writers, but players give Manning the edge for stats.

February: 2005: Sporting News rates Peyton Manning the 15th best QB of all time. Brady comes in at 19th.
Nutshell: Sporting News Magazine, already declared dead years before, publishes this list that no one ever sees because no one subscribes to the Sporting News and in 2005 they were charging for this kind of exclusive content. Since they were charging, I have no idea who is in the top 10 outside of the obvious candidates. Brady had just won his 3rd Superbowl with his greatest statistical performance, and he started getting a little separation on the Brady vs Manning debate because he was up 3 rings to none. Of course plenty of people still sided with Peyton because he just put up the greatest QB season of all time with 49 TD's and the best passer rating ever. So the points remained the same, but the play of both elevated them even higher.

February 2007: Vinnie Iyer on Brady and his ranking at SN's Greatest #19: "If you look at Brady's regular seasons, they are pretty good, but his three rings are what have him at 19th, or 21 spots ahead of another pretty good regular-season quarterback, Donovan McNabb. For that matter, I think Brady should be in the top dozen."
Nutshell: Manning wins his first Superbowl, almost completely squashing the angle that Brady proponents held up in the debate. No mentions of Brady as an all-timer this year because he isn't in the Superbowl. Brady, according to Vinnie Iyer, is in the top 12. Most people at this point have Brady and Manning both firmly in the top 6 or 7. Some old people bring up Otto Graham and Sammy Baugh, which then causes Manning/Brady to fall two places. Several people start projecting Manning as the best ever, which had been happening in smaller doses for the past three years.

January 2008: Mike Martz: ""Tom Brady will be at the pinnacle of all those who ever played," said former head coach Mike Martz, now the offensive coordinator in San Francisco."
Jerry McGee of the San Diego-Tribune: "I like (Brady) better than Unitas because Unitas couldn't throw the ball like Brady. And I like him over Montana because I think Brady has a better arm and cerebrally is Montana's equal."
Nutshell: There is no article mentioning a Brady vs Manning debate. When the Colts lost to the Chargers in the Divisional Round, it cost us a week of chest-beating grunts from Bob Kravitz and others. But it wouldn't have mattered. There is only one debate left raging right now...Is Brady the best QB of all time? Mike Martz is given to hyperbole and has always been a Brady fan, but I was shocked to see how many people are putting him in the debate. No one can agree on who to compare him with of course (Montana, Unitas, Graham, Marino, and Favre seem to be the most popular candidates, in that order). NFL Live today brought it up several times today. People who last year would have taken Manning over Brady (Merrill Hoge, Mike Golic, and Ron Jaworski for starters) are now on the fence whether to put him over Montana or just alongside him.

Of course, the difference between last year and this year is that Brady has trumped Manning for the best ever season by a QB, led his team to an 18-0 record (19-0 if you're a time traveller like the Boston Globe's book publishing department), and is on the verge of winning his 4th Superbowl. The stats defenders of Manning have lost some mojo in the same way Brady rings defenders lost some mojo in that debate in 2007.

Here is what I think:

It's a stupid question with no answer for obvious reasons. First, comparing eras is fine if you all agree on the rules. No one does and they make up them up as they go along to support their preconceived notions. Second, the free agency factor has become way overblown. While a team could stay together for a number of years in the 70's to build a dynasty, it also meant that they didn't have the opportunity to upgrade like the Patriots do now.

The real question is, what does it mean to be the best QB of all time?

How much do you weigh...
1. Win totals
2. Postseason win totals
3. Superbowl appearances
4. Superbowl wins
5. MVP Awards
6. SB MVP Awards
7. HOF receiver to throw to
8. HOF running back for defenses to gameplan for
9. Passing Yards
10. Passer Rating
11. Number of TD Passes
12. Number of Interceptions
13. Quality of Opponents
14. Pocket Passer vs Gunslinging gambler
15. Did you revolutionize the game?
16. Did you call your own plays?

The list can go on and on, and every one of these 16 arguments has been used to cast a shining light on one columnists favorite over another.

This is why it's a futile argument....for now.

If Brady wins Sunday, continues to perform as the #1 or #2 best QB for the next 5 years, and wins 1 or 2 more SB's (passing everyone on the QB list in that category), then the point will become moot. It will be similar to what happened between 1991, where Bird and Magic were in the discussion for best players ever in the NBA, then 4 or 5 years later Jordan ended the argument.

I love the debate and think about it if you're a Boston sports fan this way. If you are over 35, you got to see:

Bobby Orr (#2 player ever in NHL)
Larry Bird (#3 or #4 ever in NBA)
Roger Clemens/Pedro Martinez (regardless of roids, both in the top 5 ever)
Tom Brady (Top 5 or 6 now consensus, with real potential for #1 in 5 years)

What other city can say that they saw the 4 main sports played at their highest level?

No one, and it's just one of the 100 reasons the rest of the country hates us.